Rusted...

Time passing by as I watch myself on the mirror. Reflecting what time has done to me. I try to smile but my eyes... full of uncertainty. I started to lose it.... I barely know myself anymore. I tried to figure( it out), yet I'm in vain of myself. It's like a whole part of me is dying. I'm drifting.... with the flow of life; full of uncertainty...

Wondering....
What I'm doing....
When it'll end....
I want to rest....

In deep slumber...

Second chances?

How I wish to have a second chances...
Second chances, Always in my mind,
So precious,
Can't imagine what I can do with it,
Believe me, I'm started to...

If I do...
Never lose a chance to learn,
Start over all the wrong decisions I ever made,
Made the right moves,
Make more friends,
Cherish the best moment in my life,
Be a better fighter!!!!! Hiyah!!!

My Hope?

Wassup!!! Wassup!!! fellas...

It has been a while I hadn't post anything on my blog. Being absence in action while enduring life's everyday challenges. Yes, I lived it. That's what for this year. Next year going to be another story. I expect it to be more interesting. Meaner than ever. More action(kicking and slapping!!) Less dialogues. Let the hands do the talk. Hiyahh!!!! Ouch!! Hurt my fingers....fuuuu fuuu fuuu(blowing...)

Okay, just cut the scene, these kids be better prepared, for I'm no ordinary person. I'll make sure they drilled all of it inside their head. That would save some time for me. Moulding these kids is not easy especially when you try your hardest to mould it into a great masterpiece then suddenly became 'reject' product upon arriving at home. That's some tricky challenge yet very frustrating. It's like learning how to write with left hand(for right hand user) but in the end you use your usual writing hand(right). Vice versa... By the way I'll bring Hell for them(for special request). I love the duck(jalan itik...).

That's is one thing I had to admit. I can't change 'them' if the process is not supported(participation, understanding, awareness) at home. Sometime it makes me pray that someday they understand the purpose. It's not too late to change your life for betterness of tomorrow.

I wish nothing more than a support from those who are at 'home'. At least 'they' have their part in future. Do I need to beg for that?

Never gave up; Keep on fighting!!!

School Sports Day?

Today is the closing day of the School Sports Day that had been held since yesterday. Well I'm a bit tired and so do all of us. Everyone do their role and it went well. What's really tiring is making the 'track' in bright hot sun!!! I even got sunburn from it!! Well it doesn't matter, everything's done. What done is done and I got my first experience from it. Barely two days of marching practice, my team lose. I know, there's only two days to prepare the kids and they're not well enough to perform. Anyway, it's a good effort for them and from me.

On the other side, we won. We won the event comprehensively. I told my boys and girls, if they won 2 golds medal(boys & girls event) we are number 1 and they did it. We won it, tied with the same gold medals with our competitor, the silvers won it for us. The kids are cheering when the winner's team announced. I'm so proud of them. I hope they not only excel in sports but also in their studies. As for my remedial's pupil, I hope they can read well in my class.

Never give up ang "keep on fighting"

Out of tune

Lately these few days I'm a bit mixed. It caused me to react out of 'tune' and drifting my life with the flow. Nothing much happens lately and my biological 'clock' is broken. It's hard for me to get a sleep or even to wake up early. Sometime I force myself closing my eyes to avoid it from drying. Can you ever imagine that you were not sleeping and your eyes were closed whole night till morning? Well you better wish that never happen to you.

Gosh, why would there be a reason for me to feel bad about others? I never have any intention to do such kind of things and people tend to perceive it other than my own. Why we're proud about all the so-call cowboy thing we do? Proud to be a prominent in such filed? Are you so meant? Or meant? Can you explain what mean really is? I never being proud of my past but I tell my tale as a guidance sop that others can learn from my tale, from my mistakes and everything...

Maturity is something that you get when you can rationalize based on your life experience. Age never determine it...whether you're the first to taste salt or the Starbucks Coffee it doesn't matter. There are those who act like a 9 years old boy begging for his mother's milk. Geez!!! Get a life...

If you can handle your life smoothly, that is better than bragging how (good)mature you are. Mere perspective deceives those who is blind in the heart. Respect them, then you can see through it.

These kind of things makes me out of tune, out of my normal self. I can change accordingly but they can't change me for their own sake. I change, I decide base on my surrounding. No favors to other.

Hopefully this month I can get myself back to normal. I still have faith on myself.