My Unintended

Had been listening to this song lately. Love the lyric by Muse

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"Unintended"

You could be my unintended
Choice to live my life extended
You could be the one I'll always love
You could be the one who listens to my deepest inquisitions
You could be the one I'll always love

I'll be there as soon as I can
But I'm busy mending broken pieces of the life I had before

First there was the one who challenged
All my dreams and all my balance
She could never be as good as you

You could be my unintended
Choice to live my life extended
You should be the one I'll always love

I'll be there as soon as I can
But I'm busy mending broken pieces of the life I had before

I'll be there as soon as I can
But I'm busy mending broken pieces of the life I had before

Before you

The Creatures That Live Around Me...

Requested by a friend who eagerly wants to know what creatures had been lurking inside my home sweet home.

Creature 1:

The Cat

Guilty of unauthorized entry and giving birth to 4 cute kittens without any birth certificates near our house and sentenced to life living in our house to serve as pet.

Creature 2:

The Twin Tortoise

Found at the nearby market without anyone to be called Mom and Dad. So I decided to adopted both of them with one condition. They must stay inside here.

Creature 3:

The Fishs

The puyu

Found at the nearby lake. Guilty for being fishy. One of them bite my finger couple of hours ago. The sepat surely will be fried for my menu tomorrow. 

Creature 4:

The Soft Shell Turtle

Found somewhere around the river. Doesn't look like a good friend of anybody and very attentive listener(he never speak) and ready to snatch anything goes by. Sentenced for a lifetime inside this basin.

My New Sport..

This evening I went to the town with both of my little bros. and looking for some sport equipments. Then my eyes locked on something that I always dream of... the tennis racquet!! Among all sport that I had played, tennis is the only one that I barely knew.(with the exclusion of extreme sport)

So I decided to minus the $$ and bought Wilson racquet. Wilson? Sound familiar right? I always wanted to play tennis since last year but I always trapped between work and other work?

Last week I watched Rolland Garros at my friend's house. Rafael Nadal and Roger Federer(FedEX) is one of the match I anticipated the most.

Today I was hoping to have a match(actually practice) with my friend but the wheather doesn't seem to let us to do so. Tomorrow evening we'll go to the court at Sri Balleh.

My tennis set.

"Wilson, no wait for me wilson, I'm coming!"; from Cast Away Film

Happy Gawai Dayak 2009!!!

First of all I would like to greet all our Dayaks friends and families around the world "Selamat Hari Gawai Dayak, Gayu Guru Gerai Nyamai" for year 2009 and year to come.

30/05/2009

Upon arriving from endless trip(a night at Sibu) I finally arrived at my hometown. There are lots of changes every time I come back from anywhere outside Kapit for a period of time. It always come in big surprise packages. I got a new cat and it gave birth to four kittens. Mysteriously, i don't know whose cat is it. My mother told me that the cat just come to our house and decided to stay in our house. How easy is that? Ok, here is the twist. Previously we (since we move to the new house) have a cat and a dog. Both are not the best of friend and you know that. After a couple of years the cat gave birth to 4 little kittens, unfortunately the cat passed  away a few days later. Meanwhile, the dog also gave birth to 3 little puppy. Surprisingly, the dog accepted the kittens and lets it milk from her. Sadly, the kittens follow their mother step(died after a week). Few years later, the dog gave her last breath after my parents arrived from work. Within that day, a cat appeared near our house and automatically become a part of our family(2007). During my study at the institute, I heard the cat also passed away. Within that week a new cat appeared till today. Why does this animals / creatures keeps on coming? Okay this not main topic.

That night I went to the so-called newly opened supermarket(what so super about it anyway) HomeMart at Selirik. About the price?Nothing differs it much than any other shop in Kapit it just like a gimmick to me.

31/05/2009

Okay we depart around 11.30 a.m. to our longhouse located a Nanga Dia, Batang Rajang heading downriver by boat from Kapit town.

Photo session at the wharf with relatives

Small Kapit Town

Along the journey with my two little brothers

Arrived around 12.00 p.m.

Panoramic view of my longhouse

The old tajau probably robbed from the Brooke

My Favourite Classic TV set!!

After taking a break from taking the picture, I decided to help my biological grandmother frying the fish. Here is the facts, both my parent are adopted child since their childhood which means that I have 4 grandfathers and 4 grandmothers how great can that be. It had been 10 years I haven't come back to my beloved longhouse. I can see it on her face, I'm sorry for missing all this time. This time, I'll make used all my energy and my time here to help you and the others. First task, frying the fish. Well it  looks not that bad, while frying it I have a little chat with her and below are the result.

Okay i know what you're thinking. It's not that bad, I overfry it a little bit beside I'm talking with my beloved grandmother at that time. Anyway the fish does taste delicious especially the overfry one.

My biological grandmother sit beside my overfry fish. Sorry...

Okay that evening I walk around the jetty and saw something unusual...

The dog's neck was tied with a plastic bottle is a sentenced for the crime he had done. Crime: Attacking the livestock especially chickens. Found guilty and sentenced for a lifetime with cordial plastic bottle tied under his neck.

Now where would I get a decent mobile phone signal? It's right here near the jetty. There are lots of mobile phones hang on this hut. So would you like to buy used hp sir?

1/06/2009

The drunken master after they had done their chores yesterday night.

The miring rituals as an offering to the Gods for good harvest and life achievement for this year and after.

The offering then placed on top of the window. Sometime they put it on top of teresang.

Everyone eats together at the ruai.

Then I sang Iban songs and everyone doing poco-poco

My little brother taking a break near the jetty

2/06/2009

We take a longboat around 4.10 p.m. to Kapit town. Before that I take a chance to take their picture.

Not many people coming after 1st of June and Kapit town become the haunted town during that time.

Almost completed (probably by end of this year) Kapit Terminal

p/s : First of all would like to express my deepest sorry and forgiveness if I ever hurt anyone especially to those who persistently persuade me to have a sip of tuak. Sorry, I just can't. "Umbas meh" That's all for me.

When I'm feeling down to the earth

Long time a go, someone asked me to sit down for a while and I give it a try. When I do it, I saw a lot of thing in my mind since childhood wandering inside my mind. I reflect upon all the thing I had done in the past and recently. I learned to know myself better, boy what a life I'm having now. I had faced and through many experiences in life and yet it's still not enough to fulfil what I desired the most.

When I stop for a while, thinking all the things I had done, I saw many characters and some of them had changed with time but still I'm the same as before. I can say that my life is blessed because I work for it and I want it to be like like that. Even before I go to sleep laying myself on the bed, I think back what I had done that whole day; "did I do something wrong?", "who was the person I'm interact with? had I done something that offence / hurting them?", "where was I?, did I miss something today?," upon so many self-questioning I end up sleeping late at night.

Then the next day I'll try to change my approach and lessen the inappropirate manners / behavior I had done previously. I'm a dynamic person and analytical thinker. I put myself on others' shoe and change comply with the situation continuously for perfection.

I learned that I'm very tolerate(I put other first before myself), cautious(because I'm very clumsy sometime), hunger for knowledge and information(ICT anyone?), curious(learning human behavior and things), self-motivated(I don't die easily facing a hungry tiger), have the need for wider space for myself(small space makes me weak), and I'm a time-chaser(time goes by quickly isn't it). It does look promising right?

Bear in mind, each one of us have our own negative charge and I always tried to improved myself with the time given because that is all I have. I want to release myself from self-prejudice, I don't want to be a fish seller(selfish), chased away all the bad thought and kill my EGO for being so stubborn and overeact.

Sometime, I loved being left alone by myself and I don't know why because I used to be accompanied by friends. Probabaly remain silence for a while(sometime for hours) is better than figuring out how to finish Mr Lu's assignment(flash presentation). I'm used being alone since my childhood when my parents not around. I do things by my own and learn it by myself. Whenever I have problems, I choose to fix it by myself especially one that caused by me and rather not bother others. Mostly I end up injuring my finger, cut myself, and continuously got shocked by electric current (till now I never learn how to avoid the shock)

Okay, as a conclusion, I know who I am now and I know who I was before. I'm just a simple kid who knows nothing but playing the kites and bicycle around his house without knowing what the future lies ahead of him. The boy was ignorant and has a lot to learn about the outside of his hometown. The boy don't even know how hard the life out there would be, and all he know was "everyone is kind enough to help me", "I'll be a good boy" and good things happen to good people. The boy was so ignorant that he faced the fact of life blindly and endlessly struggle to keep his word from being destroyed by others own greed and selfishness. Along the way the boy kills his EGO and slash his ignorance into pieces so that when he walk along the road, he would rememmber how his EGO and ignorance gone. Because at that time, the boy for the first time in his life bow his head down to the earth admitting the true reason of his fight...

I Just Won't Stop "Keep On Fighting"